My journey on the Caregiver River started in rough water and became increasingly more challenging until I was out of the raft altogether and almost completely submerged. As I reflect on the last seven years, I see the experience as a crystal clear rite of passage. I was wholly unprepared when I started this adventure. […]
Lessons Learned on the Caregiver River Read More »
Holidays and caregiving evoke an uneasiness that comes when we anticipate turbulence and uncertainty. The stormy holiday season is upon us and navigating caregiving during the holiday season to create something special, minus the stressful, is the goal, and that requires strategy! We can continue to prioritize our well-being during the busy season. In fact,
7 Holiday Sustainable Caregiving Strategies Read More »
Changing roles and responsibilities Caregiving changes our relationships. If our care recipient is our parent, our relationship shifts from parent / adult child to caree / caregiver. It may be a gradual shift over several years or a sudden shift in the case of a hospitalization or a disease diagnosis. Regardless of the pace of
Sustainable Caregiving: Boundaries Read More »
Skydiving A few years ago, for his 94th birthday, Dad wanted to jump out of a plane. He brought it up every day with an insistence that triggered my angst. I discouraged, deflected, and resisted. Dad mentioned his objective to his Primary Care Physician, who said, “Why not?” It was one of those rhetorical questions that
The Art of Acquiescence Read More »
My support system repeatedly crumbled like a Jenga tower until it didn’t. Support “Support – A source of comfort or encouragement.” – Oxford English Dictionary I thought I might crack and was aware of the need to support my emotional, mental and physical state of being, but building a support system was a lot like
From Jenga Tower to Stable Structure: My Caregiving Support System Read More »
Why is this so hard? Many adult children encountered resistance to their requests for the first time when they learned that parents were not heeding the advice to practice physical distancing. It offered a glimpse into the future and an opportunity to better understand the relationship dynamic, the competing motivations and develop skills to manage
Reduce Conflict with Aging Parents Read More »
The Resistance In the beginning, I resisted routine. A routine meant I was locked in, locked into this role and locked into the responsibility. It signified the loss of spontaneity, the loss of control over how I spent my time, the loss of freedom. I felt that once I acquiesced to the routine, I was
Embrace the Routine Read More »
Amor Fati. This is the tattoo I will earn. For me, love your fate, signifies embracing rather than accepting my situation. The concept led me to the revelation that I was resisting the relationship rather than the caregiving role. Further examination helped me reach a place of clarity and calm. I resented the tether that
Amor Fati: Love Your Fate! Read More »
The blueberry battle Our letting go muscles are useful for more than just accepting and receiving help. They serve us when our inner child goes into battle with our parent. The battle may look new, but peel back the layers and uncover the struggles of an adolescent and parent, a teen and parent co-existing in
Pick your battles: Are you willing to die on this hill? Read More »
“Put a dot after those who leave, so that the names of those who come start with capitals.” Plato must have been a caregiver! Caregiving is lonely because friends and family often abandon ship when the waters get rough. You are so busy keeping the boat afloat that you don’t notice that you are alone
10 Ways the Family Caregiver Can Stay Afloat with Help Read More »
